When my world ruptured when voices taunted and told me that I when my world ruptured and voices turned melancholy into madness when ruptured my world and the voices taunted me with ruptured truths when sleep became pacing and the voices became louder when rupture rendered reality moot when the voices made my voice mute when the nurses talked to me of Spring when the meds did not work And another night at least one…
(What could I have said) they said he jumped why the I-5 bridge he wouldn’t have died no they said he didn’t jump I saw it on the news someone else said if you want to kill yourself you go to the top of the Fremont Bridge (I said In the Spring not thinking) It is spring she said (I smiled before I realized) he just wanted attention someone said he didn’t want (that…
At first, it is completely dark. No inkling of lights, no stars, no whispers of salvation. You keep going, not knowing where the going is heading. Sometimes you are certain you are walking in circles. You attempt to sit still but the road itself seems to move beneath you. ~ A tiny flicker. It does not last long. It comes in the hands of a friend, in the music of a song, in the words…
At first I attempt to make myself smaller, an effort thwarted by my generous thighs, extra-wide hips, and large breasts resting atop my big stomach. As Oprah says, you can’t hold up double-Ds with a six-dollar bra from Walmart. But money is tight so the buy-2-get-one-free bras and Hanes boxers, along with a pair of jeans and a polo shirt from the Goodwill outlet, are all that buffer my body from the world.
~
“What is it that you do here?” This isn’t the question you think it is…